Monday, June 22, 2015
Who's Going to Save the Hero?
What are the lyrics to that song? Let's have a look:
I lay alone awake at night
Sorrow fills my eyesBut I'm not strong enough to cryDespite of my disguiseI'm left with no shoulderBut everybody wants to lean on me.I guess I'm their soldier.Well, who's gonna be mine
[Chorus:]Who's there to save the heroWhen she's left all aloneAnd she's crying out for help.Who's there to save the heroWho's there to save the girl...After she saves the worldAfter she saves the world.
I bottle all my hurt inside,I guess I'm living in lie.Inside my mind each day I dieWhat can bring me back to life?A simple word, a gestureSomeone to say you're beautifulCome find this buried treasureRainbows lead to a pot of gold
I've given too much of myselfAnd now it's driving me crazy(I'm crying out for help)Sometimes I wish someone wouldJust come here and save me...Save me from myself
WOW! That is deep. It really hit home because I my maternal grandmother died of a heart attack while being the care taker for my great grand parents. Not her parents. Her husband's parents. I watched my mother do for everyone else and then have to short change herself because she gave so much. Most women find themselves in this position. We are givers and nurtures. It's in our genetics. We are more than willing to put our own hopes, dreams and desires on the back burner so that we can support our children, husband, family, friends, community and anyone in need.
I found myself beginning to walk in the same footsteps of my mother and grandmother. Sacrificing to see smiles on everyone else's face until one day it hit me that I was not smiling. I was not doing the things I wanted to do so that I could make sure everyone else had what they wanted and needed. Although I did those things with love, I recognized the sacrifice that no one else could see because I always made it look so easy. *adjusts crown* So when I didn't feel like it was appreciated I would go OFF!!! Like cussing people out and cutting them off. A protection mechanism of sorts. Yes. Very extreme but it seemed healthy to me......until I talked to my therapist about it. LOL!
Guess who saved the hero after she saves the world. A therapist. I learned that my "crown syndrome" made me feel obligated to go out of my way for people that I care about even at times when those same sentiments weren't being reciprocated or even really appreciated. Therapy made me realize that it is perfectly fine for me to "worry about myself" and that I could not help anyone if I wasn't happy with my own life.
There is a reason that you have to put the oxygen mask on yourself first, in the event of emergency. How can you save anyone if you can't breathe? You can't. Save yourself. You are responsible for yourself, hero. Get in therapy. Therapy is like the best thing ever. They are legally obligated to keep aaaaallllll your secrets. LOL! Learn your limits. Don't feel guilty about saying "no". "No" is a complete sentence.
Yes. Life comes at you fast. Sometimes things can get overwhelming even when you are taking care of yourself. Crying in itself is a sort of therapy. Let it out, in private, wipe your tears, then get back to business. You can't save yourself or the world if you spend too much time crying about it. LOL!
I say all of this to say, Fancy is trying to save you from yourself. You can be the hero. We need more heroes and heroins in this world. Just make sure you aren't saving everyone and losing yourself. Save yourself. Save the world. Cry when you get overwhelmed. Fix your crown. Fasten your cape. And get back to saving.