Saturday, September 22, 2018

You Just Killed My Vibe

I have always had a keen sense of discernment when it came to reading people but my naivety would want to see the good in people even when I could feel that something wasn't right. When I became a manager, reading people during the hiring process became one of my valued traits in my department.  I would get these vibes about interviewees and I would suggest that we didn't hire them. In every single case that the person was hired anyway, they ended up being trouble. The problem back then was that I didn't have any data to back up my decision, just my gut feeling or, should I say, bad vibes. Now, I can decide for myself who Fancy Free Hair & Skin will enter into partnerships with.

When I say "kill my vibe", I mean something about the person is "off" and there energy is telling me that their energy is not in sync with my energy. I am generally a happy go lucky person. I am honest and forthcoming with information that matters. I am fair. I am considerate. It is most disappointing when I engage with someone with whom I hope to have some kind of mutually beneficial agreement with and they give me weird vibes, or worse, bad vibes.  

In sales, I encounter all types of people. It's only been a few years for me, but I've sharpened my skills on being able to identify who to spend my time with  and who not to. I will say, I take all interactions in stride with a smile. However, I think the most disappointing interaction are the interactions that kill my vibe.

Most recently, it was with another business owner. I saw an opportunity that could potentially be beneficial for both of us. He was not marketing his services. I sought him out, found him - with no social media, by the way. When we spoke on the phone, he looked at my website and seemed impressed with what I was trying to do. We agreed to meet. I was excited. Then we met.....

I walked into the meeting space, I was immediately overwhelmed. Something wasn't right. I didn't talk much, I just listened and watched his body language. Some of what he was saying didn't line up with the research I had done. Remember, I found him and he did not have any social media accounts. #CreepLife However, I know how it is to have to shuffle paperwork with your business life when things come up in your personal life, so I brushed it off. I made mental notes and told him I would look at my numbers, discuss the opportunity with my partner aka husband, and call him back with my proposal.

When I called him back with my proposal based on things HE suggested he would be willing to offer in order to help me out, it was like he had completely forgotten what he said. VIBE KILLED! All of the sudden he needed me to make a move within a week, even though he saw that I am about to have a baby AND I explained that I wouldn't be able to finalize anything until after I have my baby. 
I was so confused. 
Bubble busted.
Balloon deflated.
Excitement out the window.

Now, I could have negotiated terms that were beneficial for both of us. But you know what Lil Duval said. And because of my initial "read" of something being off with this guy, I decided I would look for opportunities elsewhere. His change in perspective on how he would be willing to work with me in 24 hours solidified it for me. I've been there with an old tenant before. The tenant was a liar, going back on her word once, so I had to stop talking to the tenant. I switched to communicating via text or email only, so that I could have documentation. I told my property manager that I wanted her out cuz "something was off". He convinced me to let her stay and in the end, I was shafted. So, never again.

The trouble with vibes is that I have to make sure I'm not just being a punk, scared of doing something differed, and real bad vibes. If I've read the situation incorrectly, I am the one missing out. But, if I am correct, I dodged a bullet. The only way to know for sure is to go through with it. I just ain't in a position to risk it right now. #EntrePoorNeurLife 

Lesson: We all give off energy. Some people pay attention to it. Some do not. If you feel like something is off, it probably is. I'd recommend disengaging. If someone randomly walked away from you, you may have killed their vibe. It happens. Don't take offense, that relationship wasn't meant to be at that time.

Shameless Plug Alert:
Fancy Free Hair & Skin manufactures quality products for hair and skin, as well as provides natural hair consults for women who would like assistance on their natural hair journey. Our motto is "Keeping you fancy and free of chemicals." Visit our website,, to see a full range of our products and services. Sign up for our mailing list to receive natural hair tips and stay up to date on sales and the latest happenings with Fancy Free.